Half my photos are screen shots

Jason Chatfield

Good conversation mixes opinions, feelings, facts and ideas in an improvisational exchange with one or more individuals in an atmosphere of goodwill. It inspires mutual insight, respect and, most of all, joy. It is a way of relaxing the mind, opening the heart and connecting, authentically, with others. To converse well is surprising, humanising and fun. Thomas Oppong Postanly with graphic from Gaping Void.

The one who falls and gets back up is much stronger than the one who never fell. Like a bow & arrow, sometimes we go back to propel forward. There are some things you can only learn in a storm. Stay strong, focus on what you can do, and know that the clouds will soon part, and the sun will shine. Not all storms come to disrupt your life, some come to clear your path. Jim Kwik

Are you ready to retire? Not about the bucks; about the psychological impact

“Often when you think you're at the end of something, you're at the beginning of something else.” Mr. Rogers.

Thinking about your answers to the following questions can help bring your retirement vision to life:

1. What does the word "retirement" mean to you?

   The idea of a traditional retirement doesn't fit many of our ideal notions anymore of how we may want to spend our future. You may want to travel, volunteer or spend more time with your family. You could also be ready to spend more time enjoying a hobby or even start a new career. Is working part time or volunteering an option or desire for you? Having a plan of what will fulfill you during the next phase of life can help you start to envision what your days may look like.
    

2. How will leaving the workforce make you feel?

   You've probably worked most of your adult life. Making the switch can be a big adjustment. It's normal to be excited yet have some doubts. You don't have somewhere to go every day. Are you OK with that? Do you have other things you want to do? Money is only part of the picture. Make sure you've thought through how you actually feel about retiring.
    

3. What’s the first thing you want to do when you retire?

   Write down the first three, five or 10 things you want to do – and don’t expect to achieve them all in the first week. Remember, you’ll have plenty of years to fill with the things you want to do.
    

4. If you have a spouse or partner, is he or she on board?

   Does your spouse or partner want to retire when you do? If so, what's your health insurance situation? Is working part time or volunteering an option or desire for you? If you want to travel, does your partner? Talk to your partner about his or her ideas about retirement. If you have different visions, discuss them and find some common ground. By talking now, you can work together to make the best of retirement for both of you.
    

5. If you have children, how do they feel?

   Talk to your children about their – and your – expectations. For example, do they expect you to offer childcare or other favors after you are no longer working full time? If necessary, decide on ground rules and boundaries ahead of time. This can help prevent uncomfortable conversations down the road.

Singlehanded: operating life at less than 100%

My career as a graphic designer, writer, photographer and marketing professional have all been made possible by creativity, drive to learn, and ability to type 100 words per minute.

In 2018 an accident caused me to rethink the way I work.

A trip and fall accident in Bratislava, Slovakia resulted in a broken humerus (in the worst way possible) irreparable damage to the nerve that supports tendons in my wrist and hand, and long term complications all around. Three ambulances, surgery and ten days at the Medical University of Vienna. Three surgeries at the Medical University of South Carolina.

Needless to say (Self editor: I know, so don’t say it) I no longer type 100 words a minute.

The last image before my fall.

Via Teresa M. Hannefin, Boston Globe

John Dickerson of CBS News called it "the pins on America's map of tragedy."

Mass shootings, as Tyler Weyant of Politico wrote, are "America's copy-and-paste tragedy. We change the place, the town, the number of dead and injured. But the constant is lives lost."

New York Governor Kathy Hochul wondered out loud whether she should just keep the American flag at half-staff all the time.

And for the 21st time since a mass shooting in Isla Vista, Calif. in 2014, the satirical site The Onion republished its saddest headline:

"No Way To Prevent This," Says Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens

We are a sick, sick nation.

How can anyone plausibly argue that the US is the greatest country on earth, the greatest place to live, when any one of us could be shot at any time anywhere. No one is safe. No place in this country is safe.

I feel as though we're living in Biblical times, devoutly worshipping a pagan Gun god and regularly offering up our children and others as a blood sacrifice.

We are more devoted to guns than we are to our children.

We are more committed to ensuring that any violent man can get his hands on as many guns and as many different types of guns as he wants than we are committed to ensuring that our children are safe in school.

After gun massacres such as this, Democrats offer up a boatload of solutions, and Republicans dismissively knock them all down.

But some Dems have decided to stop with the solutions and demand that NRA Republicans offer answers.

So Ted Cruz stepped up and bravely took on ... doors.

Eliminate all doors in school buildings except for one, he proposes. And keep a couple of armed guards at that one door so that when a shooter inevitably shows up, they can well, shoot him.

And if a fire breaks out in that area, and the students and teachers in other parts of the building don't have any doors to use to get out, well, at least they didn't die of gunshots.

Not sure what he'd do about windows. Or school campuses with multiple buildings. Or grocery stories, synagogues, nightclubs, theaters, offices ... you know, basically any building that exists since shooters aren't choosy.

Dense Ted wasn't the only conservative to offer up solutions. Media Matters, a media watchdog site, counted 50 "solutions"that Fox News offered in the 24 hours after the Texas massacre. Spoiler alert: None of them involved controlling guns. Some included:

Armed security guard
Armed school safety officer
Armed deputy
Armed teachers (better do your homework)
Armed administrators
Armed school staffers (don't complain about the cafeteria food; the lunch lady could be packing)
Policemen
Train the students (to do what?!?)
Retired military
Retired law enforcement
Tax breaks
Martial law (somehow I knew they'd go there)
Secure the perimeter
Provide a "ring of steel" (isn't that usually called a fence?)
Better fences
Higher fences
Locked doors
Bulletproof glass (so kids can walk around inside individual, phone-booth like glass bubbles and never sit down)
Judeo-Christian values (okay, now I'm completely confused)
Attacking a school gets a death sentence
School snitches
Put your phone down
Send your kids to private schools
Take your children to church (so at least they'll be praying when they're slaughtered)
Tripwires
God
Address moral rot (I thought the moral rot was infecting the gun worshippers, but what do I know)
Pray
Don't talk about shootings
Ballistic blankets (?)

All right, enough stupidity.

Don't forget Republicans' favorite distracting shiny object: Mental health. It's the favorite bugaboo of Texas Governor Greg Abbott, who is so convinced of its relevance that last month he slashed $211 million from the Texas office that oversees mental health programs.

I'd like to ask conservative lawmakers who keep touting mental health as the problem to be solved what research they have done to find solutions. As we all know, the US is a stunningly high outlier among other rich, developed countries when it comes to gun violence. For example, the rate of deaths through physical violence by firearms is 100 times higher here than in the UK.

So if mental health is the problem, not guns, then all of these dozens of countries with extremely low gun deaths must have figured out how to handle the mentally ill people in their nations who Republicans claim kill others with guns. (That's not true, but let's play along.)

So, Republicans who claim to care about all of our gun-slaughtered dead, I have a question: What countries have you visited or spoken with to find out how they did it, and what specific programs have they enacted to keep their mentally ill population away from guns?

Hello?

Oh, you haven't? You haven't bothered to do any research, to try to take lessons from other countries that apparently have solved their mental illness problem? Really?

Gee, I wonder why.

I do love it when Republicans smugly point out that other countries don't have a Second Amendment. Oh, then guns actually are the problem here?

It's remarkable that refugees from dangerous countries flee here to escape violence and poverty in their home countries. They must be pretty damned desperate to come here thinking they'll be safe. Maybe they'll smarten up and go to Canada.

Meanwhile, the National Rifle Association is shamelessly holding its national convention in Houston this weekend, 277 miles from the school where 19 little kids and two teachers were killed with an automatic rifle.

Trump will be there, of course, as will Cruz, South Dakota Governor Kristi Noem, and North Carolina Lieutenant Governor Mark Robinson. Abbott will address the gathering via a prerecorded video, but his lieutenant governor, Dan Patrick, canceled his appearance, as did US Senator John Cornyn and US Representative Dan Crenshaw, both of Texas. Four musicians also backed out: Don McLean, Lee Greenwood, Larry Gatlin, and Larry Stewart.

None of those who canceled have changed their positions on guns, of course; they just realize it kind of looks bad to be celebrating guns and partying as undertakers a few hundred miles away are preparing what's left of those destroyed little bodies for funerals.

On this Memorial Day, please remember our new war dead.

WHAT???? I can't hear you. Long range consequences of hearing loss.

Photo by John Moeses Bauan on Unsplash

Anyone who has an iPhone can amp up their hearing of TV, movies, in restaurants, in crowds, in any conversation—without hearing aids. Or with one hearing aid and one AirPod.

AirPods Pro are cooler looking and more universal; watch news shows, podcasts, everyone’s wearing them. They also work on phone calls, zoom calls, on walks, reading audiobooks. You can sleep to dreamy, calming music in them. You can opt to go silent and cancel outside noise, like your spouse playing loud music, or traffic noise. With the Live Listen feature you can put your phone in front of a sound system, or someone you’re straining to hear in a conversation it will act as a microphone; sound delivered directly to your ears. The new Conversation Boost feature in Transparency Mode gives you another option to try in different situations to optimize and customize your experience. Since they’re designed for sound quality, there’s no comparison to hearing aids, even the ones that can be synched to your phone. AirPods are better.

If you’re too vain to wear hearing aids—you know who you are—you can look more "normal" in an earbud or two.

I lost several years of a quality relationship with my mother because she denied her hearing loss and adapted all the cover-up habits. Don’t let that happen to your loved ones.

Visit Apple for details, or Youtube does a good job of explaining the AirPods Pro technique. Search "AirPods Pro as hearing aids," and you’ll see audiologist reviews and how-to’s. Contact me any time for questions. I am not a hearing professional nor am I a hearing aid expert, although I wore them for over ten years. I’ll answer or provide resources.

Good luck and good hearing.

Update: 06/15/22. I am wearing my new Jabra hearing aids recently purchased at Costco. Why? As good as Apple AirPods are, they are quirky. I would have to pull out my phone to turn functions back on after they mysteriously went off – – and that’s rude, right? The Jabra product charges overnight while I still sleep in my AirPods, listening to music, audiobooks, whatever. There’s a trade off. So many features in the hearing aids but without the sound quality of AirPods Pro.

A bright observation

Tweet: Saw an article on "100 things to do before you die." Was surprised Call 911 didn't make the list. @bobgolen

Semi retirement (what’s the opposite of) woes

1) We fly rarely and when we do it’s to visit family. Cancelled flights are not an issue except for the houseguests and smelly fish problem if the delays lengthen to days. Enviable, I know. It’s nobody’s fault, people. Let’s stop blaming and enjoy being kind to each other. New York Times: A Nation on Hold Wants to Speak With a Manager. “It’s not just your imagination; behavior really is worse.” Take a deep breath.

2) Creativity exercise: Esté MacLeod #Coloricombo. Sign up free. Look for color combinations inspired by the London artist’s choices. Then, visit a local gallery with a new perspective.

3) Life hack: Pick up your iPhone, swipe left, instant camera access! Thank you, Apple.

4) Christmas gift success: This clock for my sister.

On Clothing

Read about it here.

Pickles

Fun to eat, fun to say, healthy and easy to make. Pickles.

The right cucumbers sliced thin—a mandolin is the perfect tool—English or hothouse, seedless, burpless, they make great cucumber sandwiches and can cross over into the pickle cuke territory in a pinch, but don’t plan to keep them around long because they will mush. Pickling cukes are better, smaller, bumpy and squatter, or tiny like the gherkin, and seedless, a/k/a crunchy Kirbies. How Many? Couple of cups.

Kosher Salt one T

Fresh dill 2+ T

White vinegar half cup

Just like this they are perfect, four ingredients. However, if you want to sneak in pickling spices, skinny slices of onion, a bayleaf or two, even a couple of half smashed garlic cloves, it’s your pickle. Mix and seal in a container you can shake or flip as you chill for an hour to a week. They won’t last long. Burgers, dogs, grilled Swiss on rye, chicken sandwiches with Blue Plate or Dukes mayo, charcuterie platter.

My inspiration, what all other pickles strive to be, is Reins Deli, Vernon, CT. By the pickle, quart or bucket. Also the best Jewish Deli food. “Centrally located between NYC, Boston and Heaven.” The perfect pickle. Cold, crunchy, dilly and half sour.

A half-sour is given a shorter stay in the brine, thus still crisp and bright green. Full-sour is one that has fully fermented, which may be better for your gut but it’s taste and personal preference we’re after here.

Sliced and fresh, garnish your Hendricks gin martini with cucumber. (Thank you, Bryce, bartender at Vendue Inn). But finished pickles are perfect for your Bloody Mary.

Oh the dill…

The Twenty Bag. Best CSA ever! Thank you Wendy Swat Snyder for the recommendation.